Joining the Exiles

Next Orientation (See below for address & date)

Our Orientations are held every other month, rotating between San Francisco and Oakland: February, June and October in San Francisco; April, August, and December are in Oakland.

Who Can Join the Exiles?


All women (and those whose gender self-identity is other than male) who are over 18 are welcome. Local members must
attend an Orientation before joining. This page describes the orientation process to become a member. To learn more about
what benefits you receive once you are a member, see our
Membership page.

How Do I Join?

To join as an individual, you must attend Orientation. This costs $10.00 to help with the rental cost
for the room (no one turned away for lack of funds). In exchange, we’ll give you a free pass to an Exiles monthly
program. To make things faster and easier on everyone, bring small bills if you can. You
must bring a legal picture OrientID with you, for age verification. We start on time and do not
admit latecomers, so please plan accordingly. The doors are closed shortly after the meeting begins. If you live outside the
area, you can join as an associate without attending an orientation, but you don’t get all the benefits either.

Will you Accommodate my Special Needs?

I am hard of hearing and in a wheelchair. Can you accommodate my needs? Yes,
the facility is wheelchair accessible. The Exiles know that there is a large Deaf Leather community, and we are pleased to
offer sign language interpretation at monthly programs and at orientation by arrangement. If you need sign language
interpretation, please contact us at least a week before the meeting. To get in touch with us, please drop a line to our
Orientation Officer at OrientationOfficer (at) theexiles (dot) org.

Upcoming Orientations

Why Must I Attend an Orientation?

Because we want to make sure all our members are introduced to basic BDSM safety
and concepts like RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink).

What Will I Learn in the Orientation?

In Orientation, we’ll cover the basics of several different kinds of BDSM
play. While this by no means will make you an BDSM expert, we want to emphasize that keeping you safe – and keeping those you
play with safe – is an important goal of The Exiles. Our main focus is education and safety, so if you just want some good
information and aren’t interested in joining The Exiles, that’s okay.