The Exiles is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization for individuals eligible for membership who have a positive personal interest in BDSM. The group provides educational events for people with all levels of experience to have a safe place to meet, explore and share information about safety, play techniques and resources, and connect with the leather community.

We are comprised solely of volunteers. Many thanks to the people who have worked to make the Exiles one of San Francisco’s oldest leather clubs!

Directors

Kara

she/her
Interim CoCo
Public Relations/Outreach Director
Cocos@theexiles.org
PR@theexiles.org

Kara (she/her) is the current CoCoordinator of the Exiles in San Francisco with a love of lipstick, heels, and flagging red. With only starting her leather journey in 2016, she is also a Leather & LBGTQ+ Cultural District member, the Cruize Coordinator for the Lesbian Sex Mafia in New York City, a Scholar at the Carter and Johnson Library, and a Folsom Street Fair Playground volunteer. 

Identifying as a white cis queer leatherfemme playful-slut bottom hucow, you can find her cuffed, bound, and gagged at the local dungeon or procrastinating on her papers as a Princeton Ph.D. candidate where she studies the intersections of architecture, gender, sexuality, and leatherdykes. 

Her term as CoCoordinator continues to center the Exiles’ evolving representation towards an intersectionally inclusive leather educational and social organization, community service, and expansion nationwide. I strive for the Exiles to be unapologetic as the leading example of what it means to build a chosen community of erotic dissidents. 

Lipstick Honey

she/her
Coco
Recorder
Cocos@theexiles.org
Reorder@theexiles.org

Lipstick Honey is a cis queer, primal, femme, switch, leatherwoman currently residing in fist-deep Dallas. Her Daddy affectionately calls her baby bear as it pulls on her sassy, defiant, yet playfully loving heartstrings. She joined the kink community in the summer of 2019 and quickly thereafter found the leather community in Eastern Iowa. Lipstick Honey experienced immense heated pleasure when attending the CROP dungeon where she learned more about her desire of feeling the weight of a flogger, various delicious forms of impact, and the love of bondage. During the pandemic-Zoom-life era and thereafter she’s been able to attend several conferences including Flame, IMsLBB, WoD, CLAW, SPLF, and became extremely active with the Exiles community. So dripping wet with community involvement that she quickly was appointed as CoCoordinator of the Exiles and actively leads this non-profit organization through their commitment to education and servicing the leather community. She also attends weekly online teachings hosted by her leather mother, Sarah Sloane and when she is not experiencing shortness of breath for her love of leather literature you can find her welcoming new kinklings to the community as she frequently hosts an online Exiles’ munch.

Kramer 2

Kramer

they/open to negotiation
Treasurer
Treasurer@theexiles.org

Kramer A. Dykeman (they/open to negotiation) has been out as queer, poly, and kinky since 1995. They were a member of the Exiles in the early aughts, back when we would meet in the Women’s Building. As an economist, they like to use their affinity for numbers both to be of service and to tell the funniest math jokes on the planet.

Switchy and vers on many axes, some labels they identify with are sadist, masochist, dom, sub, Daddy, boi, and bear. To keep the cats fed, Kramer does policy research by day, and sometimes by night, depending on the deadline.

IMG_0847

honeycrisp

she/her
Membership
Membership@theexiles.org

honeycrisp (she/her) is a service-oriented slave, rope bunny and self-tier/suspender, and adorably cute pony currently based in the southwest Arizona desert. She entered the lifestyle in the DC metro area in 2010 before relocating to the desert for her health. honeycrisp currently is  the organizer of one of her local groups, keeping space in the small but fractured and transient desert community. 

honeycrisp brings an array of organization skills to the table, putting to good use her impressive Google Calendar wizarding skills and color coded to-do lists (with pretty fonts to boot if left unattended). Along with a long history of volunteering behind the scenes, she has an eye for the small details that help round out a volunteer group.

Kayla

Kayla

she/her
CoOrientation Director
Orientation@theexiles.org

Kayla (she/her) is a cis queer, white, bratty masochistic leathergirl. She explored kink privately for four years before finding the SF leather community in 2019 to cultivate this part of her identity and build relationships before returning to school.

As CoOrientation Director, she is excited to use her oral *ahem* public speaking skills to welcome all new and returning leather folx to the Exiles! Outside of the Orientation workshop, you may find Kayla mouthing off to some scary-looking tops & coordinating sensation play (impact, fire, or rope).  

Monica

Malone

all pronouns
CoOrientation Director
Orientation@theexiles.org

Malone (all pronouns), current Ms. Minnesota Leather Pride 2019-2021, is a proud service-oriented switch with swagger generally found on the butch side of our kaleidoscope. Her kinks include leather on bare skin, flagging/ hanky code, squirting, role-play, sex sounds, impact, and sensation play that accommodates accessibility needs! And recently, Malone discovered the kink of receiving bouquets from gorgeous Californians. As a new Exiles member, Malone is found welcoming new kinksters and helping others find their social home. This service-orientated switch brings loads of history in queer campaigns, non-profits, and HIV/AIDS work.

abbe2

Abbe

we/they
Newsletter
Fringe_Editor@theexiles.org

Abbe (we/they) is the Exiles’ continuing Newsletter Editor! They have been an active member serving on the board for several years. In addition, Abbe has been a frequent volunteer at many varied events since deep-diving into the Bay Area Leather/BDSM community about a decade ago.

As the Exiles Newsletter Editor for The Lunatic Fringe, Abbe reviews, edits, and layouts all our imperative content and advertisements. The Lunatic Fringe title references the beautifully deviant, extreme, eccentric subcultural people within a group, and Abbe is honored to continue encouraging these members to write stories and opinions for juicy content.

In addition to Abbe’s work for the Exiles, they are on the Ethical Slut Presents: Navigating Consent Program board, where they work many hours as both Secretary and Treasurer. Beyond their desire to serve our community, you can also find them loving up on their family, including their many, many 4-pawed members.